A (Sweet) Dream Deferred

The beautiful and talented Bee Hilton -- who shot Simon & Sara's wedding -- was able to pass me a few cake shots that I wanted to share:

The Red Velvet cake that Simon's children designed...
The Almond with Carmelized Pears cake -- the topper is from the '20s and was in near perfect shape... the heart above the couple says "United in Love"
Simon and Sara...

Seeing the photos made me feel about 7 gazillion different things this afternoon...

I've basically spent the past week convincing myself that opening another business is maybe not the best idea floating in my head, given the current economic sitch. Shit is crazy for everyone right now -- and I just can't afford to take the bakery on. Even if I could find a bank willing to pass me the tens of thousands I'd need to get it off it's feet and running for a bit... the truth is -- I could use that money for a few other, larger looming things, like ummmm... oh, I dunno --paying my mortgage? Maybe? Or perhaps for the rent on the shop space? My car? Health insurance? Or, ummmmmmm............. food?

I'm not giving up on having my own space to bake out of --- that's something that's going to happen, no matter what -- it just can't happen right now. My bakeshop already has a name and a logo, it's got an insane amount of support from people all over the country -- and London, it's got a kick ass menu and an old school jazz quartet playing gigs there every Thursday night.... that shit's gonna happen, I have no doubts about it ---- and as much as I would like it to be able to happen this year -- I need to be smart and patient and hold off for a bit.

It's just not the right thing for me to do, right now....

Right now? Right now --- I need to focus on the business I have and sort out some way that I can keep on keepin' on next year. This (sorta sadly) involves:
a) probably moving PULP out of this neighborhood
b) getting another job that I can tackle either before, after or while I'm at PULP
c) getting a room mate... or um, two

I think if I can make at least two outta three of those happen by the end of the year -- things will be solid. And really, in the grand scheme of things -- none of them are all that painful, okay -- the room mate one is still a toughie for me, but I'm getting over it! Really!

So yeah ------ I need to let my Sweet Dream simmer on the back burner for a bit... but it's still there. In the meantime, I'll just keep baking for the people I adore. Speaking of which -- I turned out a coconut angel food cake last week that was absolutely insane... and basically devoured by Tim and I while we stood over the cake plate breaking hunks of it off with our fingers.... yum.

And, speaking of Tim -- things are just amazing there. I have used the word "magnificent" more in the past month than I have in my entire life... but seriously, folks -- it's the only words that even comes close to explaining this one. We've been side by side pretty much every day... and it's soOoooooOoOOooo sOooOooOoOoOOo good! I had planned a trip out to NYC in a few weeks -- and now he'll be coming with me, which just makes me giddy...

I've been a happy one lately -- a wee bit freaked out by the ol' bank balance -- but HAPPY in an all caps, constantly smiley, giggle-filled, starry-eyed kinda way.